Monday, March 31, 2008

Gay football? What?!

Three things I enjoyed about BFF's football game Saturday night:

1. The excessive lingering ass slaps

Now, I understand that the straight boys slap each other's asses to say "hey buddy, good job right there. You had a great play" but the gay boys do it a little differently. Yes, they still slap asses to say "good job" but I noticed they linger just a little bit longer, they happen more frequently, and I do believe I saw a bit of cuppage at one point. Made me a little jealous.

2. This quote from the referee:

"Scottie, are there any more cookies over there?" Yes, ladies and the gentlemen, during the game the ref came to the sidelines and asked his homosexual friend sitting on the sidelines (apparently named Scottie) if there were any more cookies left. Absolutely brilliant. And for the record, all of the cookies were gone. A sad day had by all.
and finally...
3. Instead of High Fives at the end, the football players all hugged each other a "good game":

Enough said.
BFF played SO well!! He's such a fast little bugger. Who knew?! I'm happy to report that Team Eagle won and that we all enjoyed $3 beers later on in the night. All of BFF's football buddies are really nice guys and I've had a great time tagging along and getting to know them. Who knows! Maybe one day I'll even join the League!
Today is such a Blech day. A Manic Monday indeed.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

In the Heights the Musical

This is the song that is stuck in my head from "In the Heights." Do yourself a favor and watch some Latin Flavor!

100 Goodies Filled with Nonsense

Hello my lovelies.
Yes, yes, this is the 100th post on BriTunes. And just for you, I baked cupcakes.

Last night BFF and I attempted to win front row "In The Heights" tickets for $25 bucks and it was a grand ol time rushing through Times Square to make it there on time! I just said "time" three times in that sentence--woah! There we go again! Anyway, many shows on Broadway have a lottery--you put your name in a bucket two hours before the performance and you can win front row tickets for cheap cheap cheap. It normally doesn't work out so well but this did! And we won! The funny part is he won, and then I won! We only needed one of the wins but I thought "maybe Page Six would want to go." Apparently it was too little too late and homegirl running the lottery didn't let me claim my prize. As it was though, the show from the front row is somethin' else. I do feel like you miss out on the awesomeness of the choreography and a bit of the lighting, but you're able to connect to the actor's performances much more. Lin-Manuel Miranda was in last night so we got to see the Original Cast. We also met the choreographer and the understudy we saw on Saturday as the lead. Great night!

What made it even greater though, was when I received a text from Page Six about the American Idol results. Again, 2/3 with my pick going home!

I bid you farwell Chickeze or as they say in "In The Heights"--ADIOS!!!

Apparently Cassahondra is in town but I haven't seen her as her time has been spent between her auditions and EVT. Well that's nothing new I suppose, but I would like to see her! She leaves tomorrow and it doesn't like like it will happen. Slow day at work today as all three of my guys are traveling. Spin class is today...I'm super hungry...and that's all I gotz!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

This and That. Spit and Spat.

Oh my goodness ya'll! We have so much to talk about!! Let's get to it because I still have some work I need to get done before the afternoon is over. First of all, there's a new header. That picture is of BFF and I walking with our wine on the beach in CT over Easter weekend. I LOVE it. It's very "Jack Handy's Deep Thoughts" but I think it's a sweet picture. Now then.

So Alanis is my girl. My favorite always and forever. She has a new album coming out June 10 (pushed back from May 20 for some reason) called "Flavors of Entanglement." The big thing about this album is that she collaborated with Guy Sigsworth (half of Frou Frou, produced Imogen Heap's album) and that is a big departure from the producers that Lani has worked with in the past. I had the opportunity to listen to the album last night and it's amAzing! I met someone who works for AOL Music and he had an advance copy of the album so I went over there and we watched AI and listened to the album in between performances. I won't do a track by track analysis here (I'll spare you) but I can say with confidence it will be her best cd in years. It's like nothing she's ever done and at the same time it's so her. I'm super, super excited to listen to it again.

Next. Rent.

Extension, bitches! Broadway's 7th longest running musical (and my personal favorite) was scheduled to close on June 1st but due to the overwhelming ticket response, the producers have decided to keep it open until September 7th. A very smart decision as it sold to over 100% capacity Easter weekend and I can't even TELL you the last time that happened. I hope to see it at least two more times before it closes.

And last but not least...American Idol!
After a night of fanTAStic night from David Cook, Syesha Mercado, and yes even Michael Johns, I had a really tough time figuring out who would be in the bottom three and who would go home. I have to pick someone though so my bottom three will be...

Jason Castro

Ramiele Malubyand Chickeze

Going home?

Mr. Chickeze Eze. I think that Ramiele and Jason's fan bases will save them one more week. I wouldn't be surprised if Carly Smithson was in the bottom three again but I think that after last week any fans she has will dial and dial to keep her out. We shall see!! I've been right two weeks in a row, hope I'm not wrong now!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Now this is getting ridiculous...

It's no secret I have jokingly referred to myself as The Incredible Hulk. I have a temper when I drink, a dual personality, and sometimes I look very green. Today, however, I have taken it to a new and completely absurd level. I'm wearing a green shirt today from Express--one that I bought two or three years ago before I started taking any kind of weightlifting seriously. Cut to the present day. The shirt is now significantly tighter, but still wearable. I've put on about 10 pounds of muscle and about four pounds of fat in the past two years. The shirt looks great on me when standing and is totally uncomfortable when I sit down. Whatever--I'll do what I have to for fashion. So I'm sitting here at work and its been a crazy day and I'm super tired, so I stretch occasionally. I yawn, and put my arms above my head, and sort of flex my muscles...and I hear this rip. I was like "no way..." so I kept flexing and heard another rip. I look over and my bicep/tricep had RIPPED MY SHIRT! I know what you're thinking: "Oh cool! Your muscles are big enough to rip your shirt!" No. Not cool. Because now I'm out of a $40 work shirt that I don't have the option of wearing anymore. Combine that with the fact I didn't get a lunch today and have to go to the gym after work and only have peanut butter and jelly to go home to and you've got yourself one big stinker of a day. Maybe American Idol can make up for it...HULK SMASH!!!!

Monday, March 24, 2008

Take a Train To the Top of the World...

On Saturday, BFF and I attended the matinee performance of the new Broadway musical "In The Heights." Talk about being completely blown away. "ITH" is about a family and group of friends living in NY's Washington Heights, which is a neighborhood above Harlem. From what I understand, it runs from 155th street to 191st street and includes 165th street where I stayed in my first "real-life" New York visit in 2004. There are a few central characters in "ITH" and they include: Usnavi, the bodega owner the show rotates around played by the much haroled Lin-Manuel Miranda (who also wrote the show and was out when BFF and I saw it--of course); Nina (Mandy Gonzalez--this girl's voice is unbeleivable), the Stamford educated daughter who comes home from college with the knowledge that she dropped out due to working so much and not studying; Benny (Christopher Jackson--a little bulldoggy, but yummy all the same), the limo driver who falls in love with Nina much to the dismay of her unapproving father; Vanessa (Karen Olivo who I've seen in "Rent" and "Hair"), the salon shop worker who longs to leave Washington Heights, and Sonny (Robin DeJesus--the drag queen in "Camp"), Usnavi's cousin who wants to keep everyone together and happy.

The show includes many other characters such as Camila (A Chorus Line's Priscilla Lopez) and Daniela (Songs For a New World's Andrea Burns) and they add to the ensemble feel of the show. The thing that stood out to me most in this show is the choreography. It's absolutely like nothing I've ever seen on Broadway. The same thing can actually be said for the entire show. It's a mix of Hip-Hop, rap, Latin, Cuban, Salsa, and R&B. So many moments in the show I found myself holding my breath because I was absolutely taken aback by the brilliance that was happening on stage. One thing that BFF said and I agree with him, is that in the first act a lot of the characters seemed like just that--characters. We didn't feel like we were seeing the real people but actors painting a charichture of the "type" of person. I think that the second act, while not as high energy, accomplished making those characters more "real." Even if you don't know any Spanish, even if you are as white as white can be, this show has so much heart and depth, anyone would enjoy it. I can't wait to see it again! Check out a link to the commercial for "In The Heights below."

Friday, March 21, 2008

Hee hee....69....

In honor of today being 69 days until the Sex and the City Movie....and my new BFF Jess absolutely NEEDING a post today...I decided to post! It's very hard for me to post when I'm not at work--simply because I'm not bored enough. But today is a very special occasion. And now, for your entertainment, some important past events of March 21st.

*In 1413 King Henry V became the King of England. He was so bad ass. Who was he again?

*In 1857 an earthquake in Tokyo killed over 100,000. Those pesky earthquakes.

*In 1933 the Construction of Dachau, the first Nazi Germany concentration camp, is completed. You know, I don't care what they say but that camp was nothing like American Idol camp no matter how they spin it. It was a total disappointment.

*In 1962 superstar, comedienne, and most importantly, lesbian Rosie O'Donnell was born. And instantly the world was that much gayer.

*In 1980 on the season finale of the soap opera Dallas, the infamous character J.R. Ewing is shot by an unseen assailant, leading to the catchphrase "Who Shot JR?" I'll tell ya who shot JR...except I wasn't born yet so I have no idea.

*In 2008 there are only 69 days until the Sex and the City movie opens. All around the country little girls and homos giggle...hee hee...69....

BFF and I have the day off work today and we're desperately trying to find something fun to do in New York that doesn't cost money. It's harder than you'd think! At any rate, have a great three day weekend everyone!!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Hermit? Like Hermit Crab?

Neener Neener...I was right!! To tell you the truth, I surprised myself with my victory...I thought it very possible that a number of other people would go home instead. Carly being in the bottom three surprised everyone 2/3 ain't bad! As per Page Six, Kristy Lee Cook is like my ex-roommate Geneveive...she's an STD that won't go away.

I had my first freak out about money today. It seems that I've been spending a bit beyond my means. I'd say that becoming a hermit and saving up is a good option but I somehow end up spending money that way too. BFF suggested I become a tutor...and I'm not exactly sure what parent would want me to tutor their child. These are the things I could tutor a child in: Broadway musicals 1996-present, Who has been on the cover of US Weekly, Gay, American Idol/Top Model, how to travel with cats. Not exactly the pilar of excellence this one.

I was hoping to do a really fun and exciting post for DC Doug today (apparently BriTunes has only a 65-70% "fun" percentage) but I just can't get it up. So instead I shall leave you with this:

65% my ass!

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

My American Idol Predictions

I have to hurry and post this before I leave so that when the results show happens tonight and I TOTALLY CALLED it ya'll can't be like "oh, you so didn't call it." As it is though, this is a very difficult week to determine who will go home. My choices.
Amanda Overmyer
Michael Johns

And Kristy Lee Cook


Amanda Overmyer

I think that Michael's attractiveness will save him this week and Kristy's country fan base will yet again save her. Syesha, while my favorite performance last night, is always in danger of being in the bottom three, as is Ramiele. Still, I think that Amanda's static performances and inability to perform songs outside of her comfort zone will push her to the bottom tonight.

Come back tomorrow and see if I was right!!

Introducing...the new Debbie Downer



Oh's all so tragic.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Saturday Night Fever

I just received a few pictures from Saturday night and I would like to share them with you. Now keep in mind that I had a few drinks before I arrived (and by that I mean a bottle of wine, a jack and coke, a screwdriver, and a beer) so forgive the drunk face.

My night started out innocently enough with some wide eyed excitement for ColinCowieShannon. She has a cute new boyfriend and I can't for the life of me remember if he was there.

I was able to see Hot Jenn which was awesome. I don't see that girl nearly enough.

It was then time for a little over the shoulder with the man of the hour. Between BFF going to the gym much more than me and his new contacts he's quite the hottie, eh?!

A little fun with Kiwi Katie who apparently gave me a stern talking to later on in the night when I was being silly and self-loathing. Thanks Katie, I needed it. Or did I? I can't remember most of what was said. Oops.

Hot Toddy and Adam. Also in attendance was Matty Ray--three of my new favorite boys.

We also met ourselves some new friends...many of whom I don't remember. Here is one of me and BFF guy...and BFF's new friend. His "special" friend. He's super cute, huh? Apparently I "called dibs" earlier on in the night but the guy wanted nothing to do with me. He was all about BFF. Boys never want the needy guys, what's up with that?

A picture of us with Hot Toddy. This kid's eyes are seriously out of this world gorgeous.

Look how pretty Kiwi Katie looks!

BFF, Hot David and Kiwi Katie. He makes the best Raspberry Cosmo....

A picture of the guys...apparently we shared a large drink together. I'd post the picture proof of it but it is quite possibly the drunkest/most tragic I have ever looked and so I shall refrain. Trust me, I'm looking out for your best interests here.

I mentioned before that I met a few people I didn't know. Like this young man. I'm sorry sir, I have absolutely no idea who you are, but I'm sure you're a very nice man and we apparently were close enough Saturday night to take a close picture together. Call me sometime.

And you young lady. I have proof that you were with our group from other pictures but I'm afraid I never got your name. You look delightful though!

And very flexible, my goodness.

As you are aware from my previous post, we left Bamboo 52 and headed to Vvlada where I was a naughty boy. But not as naughty as BFF!! Happy Birthday!!!

It's my blog, I can post what I want to

I know what you're going to say: "ANOTHER baby?" But c'mon! Look at that thing! He's adorable! He's totes going to be a model.

More later.

Monday, March 17, 2008

You Wouldn't Like Me When I'm Angry...

Happy St. Patty's Day everyone. Top O' the Mornin, Luck O' The Irish, blah blah blah. I am indeed wearing my green underwear and my green shirt to make sure I don't get pinched. Although maybe I'd like to be pinched (hint, hint). It's a scary day on Wall Street today so let's get to it.

Friday night BFF, Page Six and I met up for dinner and drinks at Max Brenner's where I proceeded to inhale half a chicken, lots of chocolate and marshmallow, and two very expensive and very weak alcoholic drinks. After that we went and did a little karaoke where I brought the house down with a little Whitney.

We decided to leave Chelsea on the earlier side of things (I live in a city where 12:30 a.m. is "early." There's something wrong with that) and headed back up to the HK. Grandpa Page Six had a Top Model event Saturday morning so he went home and BFF and I decided to go to Bamboo 52 to see if Hot David was bartending. We went from a 6 on the drunk scale to a 12 in a matter of two drinks. I love having bartender friends. I stumbled home and poured myself into bed around 4am.

Saturday I hit the gym and then crossed water for Asian Carrie Bradshaw's birthday extravaganza. We hit Sin Sin in the LES for a very VIP party (I kept opening up the curtains and yelling "NO! You can't come in! It's VIP!")

How much do I love my VIP card? S'much.

BFF was having his own thing up in HK so I headed up there about 12 a.m. and met up with everyone. He has met some really great people while becoming involved in his football league and a bunch of them were there. Matty, Hot Toddy, Adam--such fun boys! After a few drinks at Bamboo 52 we went to Vvlada, and that's where all the trouble happened. Apparently BFF cut in line at coat check as he was unaware there was a line. The guy he cut in front of grabbed him and pushed him out of the way and BFF was like "dude, you don't have to grab me. You can just tell me there was a line." I, apparently, was not okay with that. I got up in this guy's face and was like "No! Fuck you! Don't you fuckin grab him! What's your fuckin problem?!" I was totally ready to fight this guy!! I was about to go "Hulk Smash" on him! Thankfully the big lesbian bouncer that looks like Whoopi Goldberg grabbed me and told me to calm down or she'd kick out. Who is this person that almost got kicked out of a club? Oh...I was such a hot mess.

And not in a good way. Tonight I'm going to the LES to meet up with Asian Carrie Bradshaw as it is her birthday. Green beer here I come!!!

Friday, March 14, 2008

I Need to Get One of These

Nice camel toe

Madonna's new album cover. Hot. Fierce. Major. Tickety tack tranny who is not apologizing for it.

Ain't no thang

Please enjoy this nugget of joy I just posted on Miss Annette's page: "I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'll continue saying it--ain't nothin wrong with fishsticks."

It's like the freakin Dahli Lama up in here. But seriously...they're like gifts from heaven. Throw some ketchup on them, pop in a dvd of America's Funniest Home Videos, curl up on the couch with some cats, and you've got my perfect evening. Or my Wednesday night. *sobs* I need a life....

Thursday, March 13, 2008

There's a Breeze off the laken...I mean river.

Ya'll know how I feel about babies. And you know whether or not I think you have a cute one because I've told you. We've tawlked. But might I point attention to one of the cutest babies around, my cousin Angela's new blog Laken. Yes, you read that correctly--Laken. I like to think that he's going to be a model someday, and it makes the name that much better. Now I'm not exactly sure why he has a hand around his throat....or whose hand that is....but I think he's adorable. Knowing babies though...he was probably eating before the picture, pooping during, and crying after. I mean honestly...


Hot damn I'm good!! And with that, ladies and gentlemen, we say goodbye to Mr. Chip and Dale, David Hernandez.

Please appreciate the fact that Randy Jackson has his hands inbetween David's legs. He's a dirty bird. And David is a stripper. A stripper who constantly deflects questions about his previous profession and hobby. Embrace it David! Embrace your stripper-ness!! Don't let it be the white elephant in the room.

Can I just say that Wednesday are like, the biggest night for tv ever? I've got American Idol, Top Model, Top Chef, Real World/Road Rules Challenge, Gossip Girl (when there are new episodes) and ABC's Wednesday line up (Private Practice, Pushing Daisies, and Dirty Sexy Money) when there are new episodes. If there is one thing the writer's strike has done for me, it is a growing disinterest in certain shows. For example, I'm not really caring at all about Chuck or Pushing Daisies or Brothers and Sisters anymore. I'm still excited about Grey's and the Office and 30 Rock but I find myself, like much of America, being more drawn to reality shows. It's a sickness I cannot rid myself of.

Last Friday BFF and I got to hang out with some girls I never see and it was a great time. I just barely got some pictures back from the night and would like to draw your attention to a few things.

Please take notice how enthralled Lisa and I are with ColinCowieShannon's dog, Hudson. Dog's normally love me but this one was growling at me and even snapped at my face, even though they all said he was just "playing." It didn't feel like playing. Anyway, we are SO interested in this dog and Christina Ricci in the background is so not having it. This picture makes me laugh.

Look at my left bicep! Jeez! It's HUGE! I'm totally Hulking out. You better watch out...when I'm's not a pretty sight.

This weekend should be fun. It's is BFF and Asian Carrie Bradshaw's birthday so I'm going out Friday and Saturday with them. I'm going to be one broke mo fo by the end! It's all worth it for my besties!! Have a good weekend if I don't talk to you tomorrow!

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Obligatory AI Post

I find myself talking about American Idol with eight different people and therefore I have no energy to do anything but merely post pictures with my predictions. Hopefully I'll get an actual Blog post up this afternoon. Later my bitches!
Carly Smithson, "Come Together"

Brooke White, "Let it Be"


Ramiele, Kristy Lee Cook, and David Hernandez.