Friday, May 15, 2009

Liz Lemon Truth Booth


Last night on an exceptionally funny "30 Rock," Liz Lemon was appearing on the "The Vontella Show," or something like that, and suddenly the segment went from Jenna answering relationship questions to Liz doing her own version of the "Gay Truth Booth."


Tan Girl: This guy I'm dating owns a tanning salon but he won't let me tan for free but he does let girls he's friends with tan for free so I go to a tanning salon down the street to try not to make it a thing but you know how there's no secrets in the tanning salon community so what should I do?
Liz: Oh...well...whatever that just was, it's a deal breaker. This guy is making you talk like a crazy person. You have sexually transmitted crazy mouth


Ugly Lady: My fiance and I keep arguing about our wedding plans..


Liz: Nope. Your fiances' gay. Look at him, look at you. Classic case of fruit blindness. Sir, have you ever kissed a gentleman?
Hot guy: Uh....One time in college....and a lot since then.



Girl: My boyfriend has been acting really weird ever since he got promoted at his new job...
Liz: Yeah he thinks he deserves a vajayjay upgrade. He doesn't. He's not Tom Brady. Shut it down. Dealbreaker.



Liz: Yeah, there's no such thing as bisexual, that's just some thing they invented in the 90's to sell hairproducts. Dealbreaker.



Liz: Only one snake in the bedroom. Dealbreaker.



Liz: .....I think you two are going to make it.


Then Jack and his long lost father were about to have a tender moment...



Milton: Jack, we should talk.
Jack: Milton, the Donaghuy's do not talk. We let things fester until they erupt in innapropriate anger, preferably during a wedding or elementary school graduation.
Wow, that scenario sounds so familiar. I wonder who's family it reminds me of....
Anyway, moving on.
Tracey was invited to his high school alma matter to give the graduation speech and I found myself cr-acking up at a certain moment.


Tracy: I have one thing to say to all of you: Be yourself. And I'm talking specifically to you, gay kid.

Gay kid: Who told?
Tracy: Just be yourself and I guarantee you, every single person in this room will become the president of the United States.

Wise words of wisdom Tracey....30 Rock Truth Booth indeed.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

that's not very nice and i did see that part with the vontella that did remind me of you.

JA said...

liz lemon cracks me up!

Anonymous said...

I thought the Bahr family burn was funny. It made me giggle. Do you have ads on your blog now...You sell out.
Pat

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