Friday, May 29, 2009

An Open Letter...

Dear Jennifer Lopez,


EEEEEYYYYIKES! Look at that baby! That's some fug up in here! How does that even happen, you're gorgeous! But that baby...I mean....it's like the spawn of a Latin Princess and Skeletor or something!


Oh. Whoops. Sorry. Didn't realize that was your husband. Now I see where she get's her resemblence. Look on the bright side of things though, Jen. While yes, you may have an ugly baby, at least she ain't no Sadie Sandler.


Eeeeeeeyyyikkes!!! Now that is one....pretty girl. Ooh, do you know what would be fun? If we had a Pretty Party!!!!



Ah....now don't you feel better? After seeing that baby surely you must feel a little bit better about your own, no? I thought so. So yeah, get to the point Brian. Basically I'm sorry that you have an ugly baby but look on the bright side--it could be worse.

xoxo,
Brian


PS. Loved you in "Wedding Planner." "Monster-In-Law?" Not s'much.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

not all babies can be as cute as you were. Watch out with your sarcasm or i'll have to post the naked baby picture of you with the spider bite.

Billy said...

So while in California this past weekend, we had reservations at this new restuarant that opened in Beverly Hills. And guess what the place did - they gave our table away to J-Lo. That bitch. We had to wait another hour for a table. Grrrr....curse her and her ugly kids.