You're 40 today!! Wahoo! You're 40 and yet, I haven't aged a day. While I remember watching The Muppets more than Sesame Street growing up, I'm sure my mother plopped me down in front of the program just so she could get some alone time. I know who I was as a young child, I don't blame the woman. In honor of SS's b-day I'd like to present....
The Top 7 Seseme Street Characters I'd Get Dirty With
You know that really annoying guy that drives you insane but he's popular friendly and cute and therefore more attractive? Yeah, that's Elmo. So while he may drive you crazy, your popular points will go up drastically after hitting it. Note to self: Things not to do while in bed with Elmo include tickling and referring to self in third person.
Grover is somewhat of a twink, if you're into that skinny/raver look. I imagine he likes his glow sticks, he likes his thumping music, and he probably just lays there in bed. But alas, we all go through our twink phase, which is why Grover makes his way to #6. I have a feeling Grover and I would be a one time thing sort of deal. He's too skinny and would make me feel self-conscious about my body.
#5. Cookie Monster
Another phase we inevitabely go through is the "bear" phase and Cookie Monster is a great fit for that. I bet he'd throw you around nice and good - the problem would be cleaning up all that blue fur. Talk about a hassle!! The best thing about Cookie Monster is that the boy likes to eat!! Whereas Grover would make you feel self-conscious, Cookie Monster would make you feel like the hottest thing ever! Plus your room would smell like cookies after.
#4. Count Von Count
The token ethnic of the group, Count infuses a little flavor into our list. Just think about it - he rolls into town for a weeklong fling, swarthed in velvet capes and that monocle. You meet in a chance meeting and the accent just takes you over. He starts counting and you melt before the count of ten. Before you know it, you've done it eight, nine, ten, eleven! Eleven times with the Count! Mwa Ha Ha!!! He's a special one you won't soon forget.
#3. Oscar the Grouch
Two words: Angry sex.
#2. Big Bird
Uh.....HELLO! Have you SEEN the size of Big Bird's feet? While a tad annoying and wussy, I assume it'd still be a good time. He's one of those "really tall, really hot, really gay" types.
and the number 1 Sesame Street character I'd do it with is...
There's something about that smile, something about that laugh, that hair, that striped sweater that just gets my blood boiling. Plus, you KNOW he'd be fun in bed and totally up for trying new things. And might I just say....bubble bath?! Oh hell to the yes. Now I don't want to put the cart before the horse but if Ernie wanted to invite his "roommate" Bert into the bedroom with us well...I wouldn't turn him down.